Why grounding doesn work

The bottom line, we are all trying to raise ethical and moral children. Do you think grounding is an effective parenting tool? Leave your feedback in the comments section! This is a free 1 hour online class.

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Jason Kreidman September 27, Videos. Share on facebook. Share on twitter. Share on pinterest. Share on linkedin. Does grounding relate to the problem? Another scenario: Your child talks back to the teacher and gets detention.

The 1 Secret to Effective Parenting. First Name. Last Name. All Rights Reserved. Subscribe to the Dad University Mailing List! For example:. Remove all the leftovers. Empty and wash the containers. Remove any spoiled or expired food. Wipe out all drawers and shelves. Wipe down the walls inside and outside the refrigerator.

The job cards should be very specific so that there is no confusion about what the job entails. Create 10 or so cards to have on hand if needed. It is only fair to let your teen know what the expectations are within your home. Certainly, these expectations vary depending on the family, so it is best to clearly define two or three house rules. Review these with your teen, and consider posting them:. Listen to authority teachers and parents and respect them.

Treat others as you would like to be treated. And just listen for a bit. Your child is likely to make an excuse to justify her actions. Next time, I want you to do that and I will come and get you. But you may not break the curfew rules.

So regardless, your responsibility is to be home on time. James Lehman recommends that you choose something connected to the misbehavior that will encourage her to make better choices. Have her earn back the privilege she lost.

And, for the next week, your curfew will be a half-hour earlier. If she comes in on time each night, then she can have her old curfew back. By the way, you can and should adjust consequences depending on the seriousness of the behavior. If the behavior was very risky, then she is going to need supervision for a while, and there should be a longer period over which she earns her privileges back. Therefore, another part of the consequence might be the following:. I get to look at your computer and it will be kept in a public place.

You can see your friends but they have to come to our house. So it all depends on the misbehavior. The key is that the consequence is tied to the behavior and the duration of the consequence is short enough that your child has the opportunity to try again soon. Be patient and consistent. Some kids figure things out in just a few tries and others take more time to come around. Why is this four-step process so important? So have that conversation to make sure your child is learning what she needs to learn.

Decisions made in anger are often bad. Let her know what you would like her to do and what the new consequence is. By changing the consequence, you are not being inconsistent.

Rather, you are modeling an important lesson for your child—the lesson that bad decisions can and should be corrected. Carole has worked as a family and individual therapist for over 16 years, and is a former online parent coach for Empowering Parents. She is also the mother of three grown children and grandmother of six. You must log in to leave a comment.